Brad is Good at Everything

September 9, 2009 at 3:09 pm | Posted in Song | Leave a comment
Tags: , , , , , ,
Vengeance: chill before serving.

Vengeance: chill before serving.

Brad is good at everything,

he is a natural athlete.

Alas, not me, I’m unco;

I’m slow and I’ve got flat feet.

With bat and ball and stick and hole,

he’s accurate and lithe.

All I can do is fumble,

take stupid punts and writhe, because

Brad, Brad is good at everything.

Brad, Brad is good at every f*cking thing.

Brad, Brad is good at everything.

Brad is good at everything.

The sports field is Brad’s kingdom,

be it Astroturf or tar.

He rules the skill-based firmament,

his every shot a star.

But harder yet than this

for the mediocre horde,

His prowess transfers seamlessly

from open space to board.

Games of thought and strategy

Brad masters and, you guessed it,

He just beat me at f*cking chess;

my button – Brad has pressed it.

So now he lies trussed at my feet,

my blade poised o’er his heart.

If Brad is good at begging,

he’d better make a start.

Brought to you by The Feisty Empire.

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